From Klaus to Krampus: Top 5 Films About Unconventional Santa Clauses
Undoubtedly, the wildest, most misanthropic, and cringeworthy film about Santa Claus of all time was a recent pre-New Year advert from Russia, broadcast on their central television channels during prime time. In this advert, Santa, flying over the Kremlin and inexplicably carrying ballistic missiles in his sleigh, is shot down by a Russian air defence system. Watching alongside the Russian military is an ideologically correct Russian Father Frost. In the advert's finale, as the last sparks from Santa's destroyed sleigh fade, the "kind Grandfather Frost" wishes Russians a Happy New Year and remarks, "We don't need anything foreign in our sky."
It is hard to surpass this disgraceful, xenophobic Russian advert. However, global cinema also offers numerous unconventional interpretations of Santa Claus, portraying him as a character in existential dark comedies (notably, "Bad Santa" with Billy Bob Thornton), crime dramas, action films, and even horror movies.
Red One
On the eve of Christmas, Callum Drift (Dwayne Johnson), head of security for a very famous and secretive VIP, decides to resign. The premise may not sound particularly intriguing, but the individual Callum protects—codenamed "Red One"—is none other than Santa Claus (J.K. Simmons). Meanwhile, on the other side of the world, unscrupulous freelance hacker Jack O'Malley (Chris Evans) hacks into a radar system that detects Santa's sleigh arriving at his secret polar base and sells the geolocation to an anonymous buyer. Predictably, Santa is kidnapped, forcing Callum to abandon his resignation because he must now save Christmas—and millions of people on Santa's "naughty" list. The mission involves the entire "magical CIA," led by Lucy Liu. Callum and hacker Jack embark on a quest to find "Red One," encountering the unfriendly horned Krampus, battling snowman monsters, and thwarting the plans of a powerful witch. This family-friendly Christmas action film predictably did not impress critics but was well-received by audiences. Ultimately, the film reveals one of Santa's greatest secrets—how he manages to deliver presents to all the children in the world in one night and how crucial special training and good physical fitness are for this task.
Violent Night
When Norwegian director Tommy Wirkola ("Dead Snow," "Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters") takes the helm of a Christmas comedy, one should think twice about letting children watch. Despite featuring traditional Christmas film elements—a large family in a country house, Santa dropping by, and a girl who believes in Christmas—the film's brutality makes it much closer to a crime action film than a family comedy. David Harbour ("Hellboy," "Stranger Things"), portraying Santa Claus, resembles John McClane from "Die Hard" more than a jolly fat man with a sack of gifts. The plot is similar too: Santa (a heavy-drinking misanthrope disillusioned with humanity) arrives at the mansion of the wealthy Lightstone family just as a group of mercenary bandits takes over, intending to rob the family safe full of gold owned by the influential Gertrude Lightstone. Santa has no choice but to recall who he was millennia ago, grab a sledgehammer, and... Still wondering whether to invite the kids? Consider that a scene reminiscent of similar moments from the comedy "Home Alone," where the young heroine defends herself against bandits in the attic while waiting for Santa's help, ends with the painful and spectacular deaths of several villains. Kevin McCallister could never have imagined this!
Fatman
Imagining Mel Gibson, the star of Lethal Weapon, Braveheart, and Mad Max, as Santa Claus is quite difficult, yet it happened... However, Gibson’s Santa still resembles an aged Martin Riggs from Lethal Weapon—the same sociopath with "Vietnam syndrome" and, if not suicidal tendencies, then definite depression. And there’s little reason to rejoice over Gibson’s Santa—the magical world he inhabits resembles more of an ethnic ghetto of Christmas elves and a secret government facility (which it actually is, as Santa signs a contract with the U.S. government for defence manufacturing to keep his failing Christmas business afloat).
However, this crime fantasy tells a different story—Santa still keeps his lists of good and bad children and gives them presents accordingly. One spoilt, wealthy brat, having received a lump of coal for Christmas, hires a professional hitman to kill Santa. But Santa, despite suffering from sciatica and injuries—someone fired a shotgun into the sky as he flew over rooftops in his reindeer sleigh—is still capable of defending himself. No wonder he practices daily by shooting cans with a massive, ancient Colt revolver from the American War of Independence era.
Krampus
This fantasy horror with elements of black comedy reminds viewers of the dark side of Christmas and that Santa Claus has an opposite—a sinister spirit from Austrian and Bavarian folklore named Krampus. The not-so-friendly Engel family, gathered for Christmas dinner at their country house, will soon be reminded of this. Their constant squabbling upsets one of the children so much that he loses faith in the Christmas spirit and... well, instead of the spirit of Christmas, darkness falls, a blizzard begins, and the horned monster Krampus appears. He brings along an array of torture tools and a cohort of magical helpers—dark elves and malicious gingerbread men—who are also eager to spill the blood of the family members who have lost their belief in goodness.
Confronting the Christmas fiends naturally brings the family closer, but Krampus doesn’t intend to stop at mere discipline—he seriously plans to drag the Engels forever into his grim domain.
Rare Exports
This adventurous comedy-fantasy thriller by Finnish director Jalmari Helander (Big Game, Sisu), based on his own short film, finally allows us to see Santa through the eyes of his fellow countrymen, the residents of Lapland. The story begins with the American company Subzero Inc. conducting drilling operations atop the Lapland hill Korvatunturi. However, instead of oil or minerals, the drillers hit a 20-metre layer of sawdust, beneath which lies a sheet of ice. It turns out that Korvatunturi is not a fell but a giant ancient Sami burial mound, within which lies a tomb holding an unprecedented treasure.
The drilling supervisor orders explosive work to reach the tomb before Christmas. However, before this, local boys Pietari and Juuso sneak in, convinced that Joulupukki (Santa Claus) is buried inside the mound. Soon, strange events occur in the area—someone slaughters a massive reindeer herd, household appliances vanish from local homes, and later, children begin to disappear. Eventually, a strange wild old man is caught in a reindeer trap, revealing himself to be one of the elves serving the Santa Claus buried beneath the ice.
The bankrupt Lapland reindeer herders find a rather practical commercial use for this sensational discovery—just as the film’s title suggests.